Faith and Parenthood

Claire writes:

Are you a woman of faith? If so, how have you incorporated your faith into your parenting? 

I have a deep faith and it has sustained me in ways I am sure I will never know. This is something that is deeply personal and each person must come to his or her own conclusions about it. For me, my faith has poured out into all areas of my life, including parenting. I might add that through the years, I have matured and my displays or demonstrations of what I believe have changed. Sometimes we are so zealous about something that we become strict and inflexible. Although we think we are doing others a favour by sharing (or imposing) these beliefs, we can actually hurt others. This can happen with religion, but can also happen with other things. Children are shaped by us, but should not be hammered. My own children can attest to this. In many ways, our beliefs have helped our family, but there have been times when as a parent I have imposed something on my child that I should have left alone. Sometimes we do this out of fear. We are afraid our children will be hurt so we impose restrictions that sometimes are unrealistic. It is one thing to tell your son or daughter to be safe while driving as opposed to not allowing them to drive because you fear they will be in an accident. Or not allowing you daughter to date, because you are worried she will get pregnant. It takes a long time to sort out what is important and what is not worth making an issue of.

Our parents have done it to us and I have made these mistakes with my children and they will probably make some with their own children. In some ways these areas are like having the perfect labour and delivery. It just may not happen. I always tell people that our children are not perfect because they did not get perfect parents. I also think that you can go too far on the other side and set no limits for your child. This too is disastrous. Robb used to say that child rearing is like holding a wet bar of soap in your hand. If you hold it too hard, it slips out and if you hold it too lightly it slips out. Holding it so it stays put, difficult!

This is an immense area and I will try to elaborate more later.

well, i am still in pjs, but managed to eat a big bowl of oatmeal

it’s off to the fields to work! (i.e. the office).

don’t forget to hug someone today and smile at someone you do not know

Catherine

About Catherine

Catherine is a mum who lives in Chesapeake, Virginia; she and her husband, Robb, have ten children, and have operated a family medical practice for thirty years. This blog is a place she shares thoughts and answers questions -- especially from other moms, but from anyone! -- about pregnancy and child-rearing, marriage, sickness and health, and lots of other things.
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